just...for...today...

March 28, 2012

Facing feelings

Page 90

"We may fear that being in touch with our feelings will trigger an overwhelming chain reaction of pain and panic."

Basic Text, p. 30

While we were using, many of us were unable or unwilling to feel many emotions. If we were happy, we used to make us happier. If we were angry or depressed, we used to mask those feelings. In continuing this pattern throughout our active addiction, we became so emotionally confused that we weren't sure what normal emotions were anymore.

After being in recovery for some time, we find that the emotions we had suppressed suddenly begin to surface. We may find that we do not know how to identify our feelings. What we may be feeling as rage may only be frustration. What we perceive as suicidal depression may simply be sadness. These are the times when we need to seek the assistance of our sponsor or other members of NA. Going to a meeting and talking about what is happening in our lives can help us to face our feelings instead of running from them in fear.

Just for Today: I will not run from the uncomfortable emotions I may experience. I will use the support of my friends in recovery to help me face my emotions.

Copyright (c) 2012, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

Sunday, March 20, 2011

no mas dating para me

Well lots has changed since my last post....I decided to take a chance and follow my heart and it turns out it was not the best decision for me to make.... I have been in many different types of relationships and I have gone through a lot in my life of dating but, I can honestly say this is the first time experiencing what I am right now. I took a chance and I was let down. I started falling in love with someone that doesn't feel the same way. It was so hard to say goodbye but, I know that I (and Lily) deserve so much more than just settling. It is hard because I really saw a future for us, and it is so hard just thinking how horribly off I was about our relationship. It is crazy how you think you know someone then all of sudden you feel like you have been spending all your time with a complete stranger. I have decided that dating sucks and I am going to focus all my time and energy on three things....Myself, Lily, and school! It is about time I take some time for myself. I have spent my whole life trying to make everyone else happy and I never take the time to do what makes me happy.

On a happier note I have found a new passion that I am so excited about....BAKING....I know crazy, everyone keeps asking why I want to learn how to bake. And I don't really have an answer for them all I know is I love doing it and it makes me smile. I have decided to have the theme for Lily's second birthday be a jungle/circus theme and I am going to make a bunch of cupcakes that look like elephants, monkies, clowns. and lions...I bought the book "Hello Cupcake" and I am having so much fun exploring different teniques for doing things. I have always been scared of cooking and baking because I was so worried I wasn't good. Right now in my life I say "who cares, I am having fun" Here is my first attempt at the elephant cupcakes. I am so excited I am planning it over a month in advance :) Besides the fact that she deserves the best birthday any two year old has ever had !