just...for...today...

March 28, 2012

Facing feelings

Page 90

"We may fear that being in touch with our feelings will trigger an overwhelming chain reaction of pain and panic."

Basic Text, p. 30

While we were using, many of us were unable or unwilling to feel many emotions. If we were happy, we used to make us happier. If we were angry or depressed, we used to mask those feelings. In continuing this pattern throughout our active addiction, we became so emotionally confused that we weren't sure what normal emotions were anymore.

After being in recovery for some time, we find that the emotions we had suppressed suddenly begin to surface. We may find that we do not know how to identify our feelings. What we may be feeling as rage may only be frustration. What we perceive as suicidal depression may simply be sadness. These are the times when we need to seek the assistance of our sponsor or other members of NA. Going to a meeting and talking about what is happening in our lives can help us to face our feelings instead of running from them in fear.

Just for Today: I will not run from the uncomfortable emotions I may experience. I will use the support of my friends in recovery to help me face my emotions.

Copyright (c) 2012, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

It's Getting Closer and Closer !!!!

Okay so I'm pretty sure I experienced my very first real life contractions last night. I was just minding my own business watching some Leno and I got a pretty intense pressure feeling in my lower back. I also started to get Braxton Hicks pretty frequently. The pressure would start in my lower back and move to my Va Jay Jay and as that would happen my uterus would harden. This went on for about 4o minutes and then I fell asleep.

I can't really describe the feeling I had while this was going on but it was pretty crazy. I just relaxed and took deep breaths. I had such an overwhelming feeling of calmness. I know I probably sound crazy but I just have the best feeling about everything and I really really cant wait for this adventure to start. Yes I have been quite the miserable pregnant lady and I'm sorry (Ry, family and friends) but this has been the hardest thing I have ever done in my whole life. But I wouldn't change it for ANYTHING! I feel so connected to her lately and I can't wait for that connection to grow and become even stronger...

Sorry enough rambling I just want to say that I am so so so so excited and I can't wait to see my baby girl...In just six to eight more weeks (thats when I'm planning on having her :) ) I will be holding her and kissing her!!!!!! I can't believe she started out as this

and now she is even bigger than this ( this was taken almost seven weeks ago)

LOOK at those lips.....I can't wait to kiss em!!!!!!!

2 comments:

KrisFlower said...: She better not come before your shower!!!
I love you; March 18, 2009 at 12:49 PM
ASRussell said...: how exciting!!! we are all getting very anxious to meet little lily!!!; March 19, 2009 at 6:56 AM