March 28, 2012

Facing feelings

Page 90

"We may fear that being in touch with our feelings will trigger an overwhelming chain reaction of pain and panic."

Basic Text, p. 30

While we were using, many of us were unable or unwilling to feel many emotions. If we were happy, we used to make us happier. If we were angry or depressed, we used to mask those feelings. In continuing this pattern throughout our active addiction, we became so emotionally confused that we weren't sure what normal emotions were anymore.

After being in recovery for some time, we find that the emotions we had suppressed suddenly begin to surface. We may find that we do not know how to identify our feelings. What we may be feeling as rage may only be frustration. What we perceive as suicidal depression may simply be sadness. These are the times when we need to seek the assistance of our sponsor or other members of NA. Going to a meeting and talking about what is happening in our lives can help us to face our feelings instead of running from them in fear.

Just for Today: I will not run from the uncomfortable emotions I may experience. I will use the support of my friends in recovery to help me face my emotions.

Copyright (c) 2012, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

Thursday, July 31, 2008

Ani Difranco

Check out my favorite song by Ani, it is the first video to the left :) 

Let me tell you why I love Ani.....Ani has helped me through many many hard times in my life. Silly I know, but no matter how horrible I feel I can sing her lyrics and all of a sudden everything is okay...I feel like I can conquer the world...She really makes me realize that anything I am upset about is really not that bad. 

Last summer Kin, Stac, Brooke, Taeler and I took a road trip to San Diego to see Ani in concert. We stayed at the hotel she was performing at. One of the BEST moments of my life was sitting on the porch outside our hotel room drinking a beer and listening to Ani warm up. Yep I heard her sing the itsy bitsy spider. It was life changing. 
This picture was taken at the concert in Salt Lake City just a few weeks ago. I love her so much that I'm not even mad she like boys now. JK everyone.. You all know that I love everyone no matter what they do or who they do for that matter just as long as they are true to themselves and they don't harm animals. 

Here are the lyrics......
32 Flavors"

squint your eyes and look closer
I'm not between you and your ambition
I am a poster girl with no poster
I am thirty-two flavors and then some
and I'm beyond your peripheral vision
so you might want to turn your head
cause someday you're going to get hungry
and eat most of the words you just said

both my parents taught me about good will
and I have done well by their names
just the kindness I've lavished on strangers
is more than I can explain
still there's many who've turned out their porch lights
just so I would think they were not home
and hid in the dark of their windows
til I'd passed and left them alone

and god help you if you are an ugly girl
course too pretty is also your doom
cause everyone harbors a secret hatred
for the prettiest girl in the room
and god help you if you are a pheonix
and you dare to rise up from the ash
a thousand eyes will smolder with jealousy
while you are just flying back

I'm not trying to give my life meaning
by demeaning you
and I would like to state for the record
I did everything that I could do
I'm not saying that I'm a saint
I just don't want to live that way
no, I will never be a saint
but I will always say

squint your eyes and look closer
I'm not between you and your ambition
I am a poster girl with no poster
I am thirty-two flavors and then some
And I'm beyond your peripheral vision
So you might want to turn your head
Cause someday you might find you're starving
and eating all of the words you said

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